In the eye of the hurricane all is quiet… not only is this one of my favorite lines from Hamilton, but something I heard many years ago that has stuck with me in times of turbulence. But I recently realized that every one of us live in the eye of the hurricane every day. The self discovery comes from how we choose to define the hurricane.
My daily hurricane consists of:
* My overwhelming calendar that I choose to fill to the brim (a topic for self-analysis that I’m working on).
* Guilt for not getting through my to-do list of social obligations.
* Self-doubt… is what I’m doing enough?
* Social media comments… good and bad.
* Incessant self-reminders of everything I want to experience and accomplish while I still have the health, energy and time to do so.
* And my ever present sadness of the state of our planet, human injustices, and what I can do to help.
These are the immediate things that come to mind when I think of my mental hurricane. Wow… this seems like a lot.
Multiple times a day I am enveloped by the magnitude of all these thoughts that feels like a powerful vice slowly closing in on me from every angle. Thankfully, I’ve learned the magical power that comes from being still. In that stillness I give thanks that I’m alive to feel all of these emotions. In the moments that follow I hit the refresh button on my purpose, something I revisit, question and breathe into daily. And then I take inventory, questioning if my actions are aligning with my purpose. If my purpose is to share and encourage unconditional Love, Joy and an endless energy of growth, am I using all of my relationships, encounters, and platforms to manifest my purpose—even in those instances that may outwardly appear more self-serving than serving.
The latest book I’m reading that has quickly shot to the top of my all time favorites is “Reboot” by Jerry Colonna. As I took a break from writing this I picked up the book to read a few more chapters. The first thing I read was:
“Aliveness comes from living a life of personal integrity in which our outer actions match our inner values, beliefs, wishes, and dreams… This then defines our life’s work not as a path to be discovered (and certainly not by following someone else’s map) but as a way of being, where each day is a chance to live into the command to live with the inner and outer in alignment. Acknowledging the days, weeks, months, and years when we have not lived that way, giving ourselves the do-over, the freshness of beginners mind, to rise again and try again.”
Being still and turning inward to assess and reboot is something I’ve become accustomed to doing multiple times a day. There are some days where the noise of the hurricane is so loud that I have to treat my brain as a small lashing-out-of-control child and say STOP! Chill the F*** out! Breathe. Accurately assess. Stay quiet. Now take one small step in the direction that aligns with your purpose.
There is so much noise in the world that is hard to ignore. More times than not it feels like the noise imposes and continuously disrupts my purpose, my plan for the day, my flow. But the truth is… I can choose which noise to listen to, which noise to silence and which to ignore. My life, my choice.
One of the hardest battles for me is choosing a life that requires being seen—to have a voice and a presence farther reaching than my own inner circle. Quite often when the noise gets overwhelming, the temptation to change course and live a serene life off the grid is a welcome option. And then… I revisit my purpose—and the Joy I get from communing with others… sharing with each other what we know and what we learn quickly silences the hurricane. The noise is still there, just like the sun is still in the sky even when it’s dark, I just choose to amplify the parts that live in harmony with my purpose where all is quiet, inspiring and clear.